Summer…never enough time to do all the nothing you want

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Is it really September?  It seems to me in retrospect that my project for the summer was to cultivate the ability to be peacefully, joyfully, consciously home with both boys.  Just as I’m starting to feel successful in that endeavor, it’s time for Akiva to begin kindergarten.  He will have his first day at JCDS on Wednesday, and we are both a little at odds with the coming new reality.

We’ve had wonderful adventures these past few weeks, my sons and I.  We’ve gone to the (fantastic) instrument petting zoo at the Longy School of Music.  We’ve worked in our garden and made a few things grow.  (Precious few, alas, but I still have hopes for the tomatoes and a few cucumbers and carrots.) We’ve gone on picnics and play dates and visits to splash parks.  We’ve reconnected with old friends and made new ones.  We’ve eaten herbs straight from the ground wherever we could find them.  (My children have a thing for chives!)  We’ve gone for rain walks and free outdoor theatre.

I, meanwhile, have started to mellow, started to understand more about how to be a stay-at-home mother.  I’ve become more flexible about time, more interruptible, more willing to delegate, more capable of including the children in a task even if it ends up taking longer.  I’ve gotten better at cultivating a team feeling between the two boys rather than arbitrating their disputes from on high.  I’ve gotten more comfortable with the loose ends and the interruptions and the spills and bumps.

We’ve traveled to visit both sides of the family and lived to tell the tale.

It’s been a good summer, and not just in the “learning experience” kind of way.

Now the days are starting to shorten, and we are heading into yet more unknown territory.  Akiva is anxious about school, and I am starting to mourn, in anticipation, the loss of a kind of intimacy between us, the sweetness of long lazy chats while I cook and Gideon naps.  He’s going to be a busy, grown-up boy, for better and worse.

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2 thoughts on “Summer…never enough time to do all the nothing you want

  1. Sounds like you accomplished what you set out to do. You won’t forget how to be interruptable, I promise.

    Best of luck to Akiva, the big boy. And to you. Another page is turned. It will be okay, again, I promise.

    My kids (well, OK, Abby) love chives, too!

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